Sunday, September 21, 2008

I'd like to start by saying that I have improbably been up for 38 straight hours and have no idea how I am still awake. I have some general thoughts on all-nighters, but they'll be saved for a later time.

I have two new precepts which I think should be enforced.

First, you know how everybody once in a while says - "if I had a nickel for every time blank blank" in regards to whatever happens to them a lot. (For example, my name is Andrew Weber. If I had a nickel for every time people asked me if my middle name was get the idea) The government should fund a program in which each person gets to pick one of these "if I had a nickel" situations and the person gets paid off a nickel for each time. There'd have to be rules, of course - you couldn't just say "if I had a nickel for every time someone knocked down a tree in the rain forest..." - the situation would have to somehow be related to you. Also, there'd have to be some sort of monitor - people can't be trusted to monitor themselves. Anyway, these are all minor details, compared to the gradiosity of this immense plan - so I say, government get on it - it has the benefit of giving people something to keep them going in proportion for the happening of something that bothers them the most.

Second - there should be some universal songwriting rules. The one I have in mind is in reference to girls names in songs. There are tons of songs with girls names, but there are tons of repeats - several Allisons for example, among many others, while some names are simply not covered as well. Any guy wanting to make a mix for a girl should have a song available to him with the girl's name in it. Thus, there should be a universal bank of songs with girls' names in them, and bands who want to write songs with girls' names in them, should be required to check the bank and use names that have not been covered, and at the very least not over covered. That's the only way we can guarentee that overlooked girls' names wind up in songs, ensuring that any mix can be designed with any girl in mind.


AndrewEberle said...

Maybe you should just date girls with extremely common names like I do. Or maybe you should just date girls in general?

waldinho said...

what about names that are sort of covered?

for instance, the beatles have "Julia", should fountains of wayne have to change "Hey Julie"?

also, when will you make me a mix?